Paths, Options and Questions
by dancing-badly
Summary: Alicia/Will Alicia ponders the consequences of that lunch promised in 1x17 between her and Will to discuss 'stuff'.


TGW #1 - PATHS

Alicia looked ,for what had to be the hundredth time, at her day planner. There it was. Right there next Tuesday, scribbled in blue ink. "Breakfast. Will. 9:15am. Angie's Pancake Hut". They'd changed their lunch plans into breakfast plans when it became obvious neither of them could guarantee they would be free at that hour. So it was breakfast. Breakfast at what Will assured Alicia was the 'best breakfast place in town'.

She couldn't stop staring at it, thinking of what it meant. Breakfast was so much more intimate than lunch was. It would appear so much more illicit than a simple lunch between colleagues.

What did it mean, this breakfast. The last time they spoke about this was the day after "the moment" – which is what Alicia had taken to calling it. The promise/threat of a discussion had placated her into thinking it would never happen, that he would conveniently forget to arrange it. And if he forgot, she certainly wasn't going to remind him. While it was confusing, it was a hell of a lot simpler to ignore it and pretend nothing happened.

But something had happened and despite her protestations, Alicia enjoyed it. She'd forgotten what that type of touch had felt like....it had been almost a year since she'd been with Peter that way. Ug, Peter. She'd regretted sleeping with him the morning after. It was an impulse decision made out of anger and desperation. She had every intention that night of staying with Will in his office and ravishing him....but fate got in the way and she ended up driving home angry, guilt-ridden, and horny. Peter was convenient.

She didn't want Peter to think she was beginning to forgive him (she didn't even know if she was beginning to forgive, but she certainly didn't want to give him that impression). And she certainly did not trust him. To share her body like that....after all his whoring, it made her ill to think about. Even now, sitting at her desk, Alicia's stomach made a hurl when she dwelled on it too long.

But again, Peter was convenient.

She stared at the breakfast date again, tapping it with her pen. She had absolutely no idea what she was going to say or what she was going to do. She had four days to figure it out apparently. Four days until she had to decide whether to close the door on Will for good.

It was a heady decision.

The sexual tension had always existed between them, it was something that made mock trials back at Georgetown so exciting. They were both thrilled by the law and by each other and it made excellent foreplay.

But that is as far as it ever went. It was only foreplay. Looking back, Alicia couldn't tell you why it never went further. Perhaps it was his reputation as a ladies man that held her back....or she was afraid of what going there with her friend would mean. It would have meant commitment. Or maybe he just wasn't that interested.

Whatever it had been, once she met Peter, the game was over. He cheesily, had swept her off her feet.

The tension between her and Will never truly went away, it just became muted over the years as they both went separate paths in life.

She should have expected though, that it would have returned in full force when she accepted the job at his firm. He was still as sexy as ever and she was rather 'available' depending on her mood. Their constant close proximity wasn't helping the matter at all.

If she was to be honest with herself, Alicia was frightened. Frightened of starting over...of new passions...of learning someone new. Peter was comfortable and she liked the life they had built together.

But that comfort was beginning to get rather monotonous. Re-entering the workforce had given her back a passion she had forgotten she'd had. She didn't regret staying home to raise her children, it was a wonderful part of her life. But soon her children would be going off to college and she didn't know what the future would look like after that. One of the reasons she was still with Peter was because of the children and to provide them the most stable and loving home possible. But once they had left to live their lives, could she stay with him....just the two of them?

She had four years of this lifestyle left. What if she didn't want to be with Peter after that. Would she be alone? Was Will her future or her present. Regardless, she couldn't very well ask him to wait four years until her children went off to college. That was unreasonable.

She had no idea what she was going to do. None, whatsoever. But, she had four days to decide.

FIN


End file.
